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Sunday, 18 March 2012

Wow, what happened...

I have honestly been kind of surprised at how well things were going. I really didn't feel like I was struggling with keeping my calories where I wanted them. Then yesterday....

I really don't know what happened. All I can really say is I waited too long to have lunch, way too long and then I inhaled a bunch of calories without being really aware of what I was ingesting. Then when I stood back, I realised I have eaten way more than my daily calories in that one meal and I couldn't stop. Well, yes, you're right, I COULD have stopped, I just didn't want to badly enough.

I'm sitting here thinking about what else happened yesterday. I know I wasn't busy enough. I know I was slightly upset that I had set some goals for yesterday that I couldn't motivate myself to do. I was also slightly disappointed that a friend I thought I would see this weekend couldn't come here, so as a result I didn't have plans for 1 of 4 weekends a year where my ex has my child. Also the fact that they are away on vacation and I haven't heard from them since they left on Thursday no doubt had some effect as it has me slightly upset. But realistically none of this adds up to the really upset state that is usually the trigger for a... dare I say it, binge like yesterday. I guess maybe all factors together were the match that lite the fuse.

So as a result yesterday I hate a bunch of stuff. Honestly some of it, as I was eating it, I didn't even really want, but I ate it anyway. I guess I need to just consider it a lesson and move on.
So yes, I dropped my cell phone, or scratched my car yesterday, but I will not stomp on the phone just because I dropped it, or drive the car off the cliff just because I scratched it. Today is another day, and I am back on track. I still have my goals for the  30th of this month, and for the 8th of April. I will do all I can to get to those goals.

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